Hero of the week

What one milestone signals the reaching of adulthood more than getting your driver's license?  I would say nothing.  No wonder telling an elder they should no longer drive is such a cause for relationship problems and  self concept problems for the elder.  And how dare the whipper snapper whose diapers you changed dare now try to tell you what you should or should not do.  I have seen over the years how this one topic has been a root of serious relationship problems between a parent and a child.

So my hat is off this week to the doctors with the courage to be the ones to tell an elder they should not drive.  About a month ago, my mother's doctor told her she should not be driving.  After the psychological testing was complete, she told my mother in no uncertain terms she should no longer drive.  My mother thinks it is related to her stroke and she thinks it is not permanent.  And there is no point in telling her it is permanent.  All that matters is that she knows at this point in time she should not drive.  My mother was somewhat taken aback at how "stern" the doctor was in making her point.  Good for her!  I explained to my mother how you could stand to lose everything you had worked for in your life if you don't take the doctor's determination seriously.  Fortunately my mother follows the advice of the experts.

Over the years I have seen how much more difficult it is for a man to give up driving.  The loss of independence, of being strong & self sufficient is extremely hard on the self concept of men.  This week I had a new resident go out driving 2 days in a row and get lost.  Thank you, thank you, thank you to his doctor who immediately made the decision for the family and the resident that he should no longer drive.  In the past, I've seen so many doctors opt out of that discussion, saying it is a family matter.  Thank you to these 2 doctors who have the courage to do what is right, not only for the patient but for the community and ease the burden for the family.  There are enough difficult decisions for the family to make.  Thank you for being on the team and "taking the heat" for this very serious, very important issue.